Mar 28, 2020 / by Winer PR / In Blog / Leave a comment

Fashion Advice for Men to Get Laid in The Sultry Summers

Fashion Advice for Men to Get Laid in The Sultry Summers

We may have our own secret email account for privacy’s sake, yet we want to know anything and everything going on with our lover. This obviously isn’t fair or healthy for the relationship. Are You An Open Book? Some people have no trouble at all with allowing their boyfriend or girlfriend to read their emails and texts, sharing passwords and the like without ever being asked. But that doesn’t mean your partner feels the same way. Just because you share it all doesn’t mean he or she has to feel the same way. Privacy Is Natural everybody, even a spouse, is entitled to some privacy. It is natural and shouldn’t be perceived as a threat anymore than it was decades ago when a husband or wife talked on a phone in another room. It doesn’t mean a man or woman has something to hide if he or she want a private email account or secure password. When it comes to questioning if it is right or wrong to check a partner’s emails or texts, the question you should be asking yourself is why you feel the need to be checking in the first place.tr bongacams Anyone familiar with technological gadgets knows that emails and texts could be erased or deleted, so what is it that you are hoping to find? Many couples have joint emails that family or friends send messages to.

But then they can also desire having their particular separate accounts as well. This desire for privacy is both natural and healthy in humans – something everyone deserves, no matter how healthy the couple may be. If you feel the need to read personal messages, the odds are that trust is a concern in your relationship. Take some time to look inside of yourself, rather than in your partner’s phone or computer, and you may find the answer you’re looking for. Signup for Our Newsletter Get Us in Your Inbox! Online Dating, Sex, and Relationship Advice Tips in Your Inbox… Follow @theurbandater Like this:Like Loading… Share This Article Facebook0Tweet0Pin0 Posted in: Dating & Relationships, Relationships It’s not too often that I go and have a bad date.  I mean, I’ve been on a lot of dates!

  Just because a first date doesn’t lead to a second one doesn’t necessarily mean that it was bad or anything. It just means that the magic wasn’t there and will still have a great time. On the other side of the coin, though, I’ve been on good dates that went south quickly, seemingly for no reason at all.  That’s happened a few times.  However, I’ve yet to experience a crap date that ended up going well; and, that, dear readers is what I am going to tell you about today. I don’t think there’s really any wisdom so that you can gain from my post on this fine fuzzy day.  Just come along for the ride, it’ll be short and to the point, I’m hoping. Anyway, I’d been talking to this girl, Carla, who I met off the good ol’ PoF site (like Myspace, that site should be dead to me… but it’s gotten me so much ‘play’ over the years that it’s hard to turn a blind eye to the damn thing) and we decided we were going to meet up for coffee.  Carla seemed pretty warm to the idea and we were set.  We met at this coffee house not too far from the local university.  She ended up being about fifteen minutes late, she had gotten lost supposedly.  Twenty minutes and less i will forgive actually, call me crazy.  I’m sitting there with my coffee when she walks up, we give each other a quick hug.  I offer to buy her a coffee or something else, she politely declines and says she’s fine.  So we sit down at a table. As I’m pouring over and slurping down my coffee, our eyes meet and there’s a couple moments of awkward silence.

I was a bit put off that she didn’t get something to drink, that was part of what we were doing, getting coffee and getting to know one another.  Right?  Carla wasn’t making it easy for me, so I asked her how she was doing.  She goes into a story of how she had some car issues and then issues with her job and then more issues with her living situation… Needless to say, she was starting on a low-note. I inquired about the job situation, Carla didn’t want to discuss it.  As I was about to ask her something else, she cut me off and said, “You know, it’s been a pretty shitty month. I don’t want to discuss it.”  Okay. At this point I didn’t notice the scalding hot coffee incinerating my mouth and throat due to the awkward turn our date was decidedly taking.  Right about then she laments that the weather isn’t cold enough, “it’s nothing like Oregon,” she says.  “Oh really! That’s where I’m from!” I reply, excited we have something in common to talk about.  That’s when she tells me about the asshole girlfriend she moved up there with.  I mentioned that living with friends can ruin a friendship, that’s when Carla offers that they weren’t just friends, they’d been in a serious relationship for six years.  Oh.

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  That’s not what I expected. I don’t have a problem with lesbians or gays and bi-sexuals.  Hooray for them! I just know that with a woman who swings from both sides of the plate has more dimensions to understand, I see that as a potential flag.  Again, Carla spins on concerning this relationship and the negativity is bringing me down.  I set my coffee down and I mention to her: “Dude, I think you need a stiff drink.”  Her face lights up, “Best idea of the week!”  Okay then!  Let’s go to a bar. I drive us to a Jazz bar not too far from the coffee house.

  We set down and also have a couple beers and listen to some good music, which was a bad call on my part in hindsight because live and loud music obviously isn’t conducive to good conversation.  However, I wanted the reason not to talk as things were just really going nowhere.  After a couple songs, the house band takes a break.  Then I mention to Carla that I have a long day ahead tomorrow and that I should go home.  “You’re lame, that sucks” she exclaims.  I’m confused by this. I wasn’t really having a good time and she didn’t seem to be either.  She yanks my arm to settle up the tab and says, “I know an excellent bar around the corner from here.”  Away we go to another bar.  Carla offers to buy me a shot. I told her she could buy us both a shot, but I get to call it.  She agrees.  I order a ‘dead nazi.’  As an aside the Dead Nazi goes by many names and no one gets it quite right, so I just tell the bartender what’s in it plus they make it and say, “Oh! You just ordered a ‘blah blah blah’ or something.” It’s a Dead Nazi and here’s what’s in it: Equal parts Jaeger, Rumplemintz, goldschlager and 151.  It tastes like cinnamon and burns like a demon blowing his load in your chest. It’s a nasty visualization, I realize… But it’s about accurate.

The shot lights us both up pretty well by that point.  Things have obviously lightened up quite a bit between us and she seems to be having a better time.  We’re joking around and I know I’m having more fun.  We each get up on stage and do a karaoke number each… I think my rendition of ‘Puff the Magic Dragon’ is top comedy, in my opinion.  After Carla’s number we go back to my car and I tell her I need to leave and we go back to her car.  I’m parked and we’re talking and I tell her I had a good time and we should do it again.  She nods her head and gives me a hug and as I begin to pull away she’s right in my face… So when someone’s really in my face, I’ll kiss em.  It could be  your pervert Uncle, Sid Touchalot and I’d probably kiss that guy, too! So I kissed her and, man, Carla kissed me back as in she rocked my seat back.  I mean, I was liking it, it was surprising.  So after some amount of hot and heavy moments in the car we both compose ourselves… We ended up back at my place.topadultreview.com I won’t give any details, but I’ll just state that sometimes bad dates can “go good.”  Alcohol is the key it turns out, alcohol is key… Until next time, try not to date rape anyone. Cheers! Signup for Our Newsletter Get Us in Your Inbox! Online Dating, Sex, and Relationship Advice Tips in Your Inbox… Follow @theurbandater Like this:Like Loading… Share This Article Facebook2Tweet0Pin0 Posted in: Dates & Details Tagged in: bad date Welcome, dear readers, to part deux in my limited series on why I’m a tool… Oh, wait!

That’s a different article.  Check back for the book “Why I’m a tool; and so can you,” by Random House publishing, on sale Fall 2020.  Moving along now; the next part I’m going to discuss in this series is respect.  Aretha sang about; it’s something that you earn; if you don’t give it you’ll get a right cross to the neck.  Also, it’s a two way street.  That said, his is what respect in a relationship means to me.Respect is one of those things that should be a given in a relationship, yet, often times it is not.  Without respect a relationship does not flourish.  Couples in a relationship lacking respect are not happy people.  A lack of respect in a relationship truly is a cancer to the participants in the relationship. What is respect?  To me, respect is the simple notion that we conduct ourselves in such a way that we always take the feelings of our significant other into account before taking an action.  Literally, it’s that simple to me.  Anything outside of that is simply a lack of consideration. Here are a couple of examples I’ve witnessed: One time I was at a concert at the House of Blues, I’d been kicked out of the venue for some reason.

I was there with one of my best friends, Kat, and her boyfriend.  The boyfriend and I were arguing with the bouncer about why I got kicked out and then Kat chimed in as well, instantly, her boyfriend turned toward her and said, rather sharply, “Can you just shut up?  We’re dealing with this!  Go sit down somewhere and look pretty.”  No, he didn’t say it in such a way that was at all amusing or meant to be a joke. It was rude and inconsiderate.  In another example I was dating this girl several years ago.  She made a habit of making snide remarks about my intelligence.  For instance, she would give me crap about the fact that I was going to community college while she was going to a prestigious university on a scholarship.  She would also take shots at me just be slow when it came to conversations.  I mean, really crappy stuff and it was usually around our friends.  My friends would tell me to stand up for myself, but I would make excuses for her.

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It wasn’t until one day I just snapped and I released all of this pent up anger and frustration when she’d made just one little comment to me about something I was wearing.  We broke up after that.  Clearly, there was a lack of consideration for my feelings and, really, my intelligence.  That sucks. Something needed to happen and breaking up was part of the process… It didn’t end there, however.  In finding out how important it was for my significant other to respect me, I had to understand why she didn’t in the first place. What I found was that I didn’t really respect myself. I didn’t stand up for myself when I was affronted, I just took it and that’s never right.  I had lot of tough questions to ask myself and a lot of soul searching to do.  It took time, but it’s really made all the difference.

I know what I can and cannot deal with from people and that’ comes from having respect for who I am. Obviously, respect doesn’t end with being considerate of a person’s way of thinking or their feelings.  Respect is also being understanding that people need space, too.  Sometimes a person doesn’t want to spend every day of the week with their partner.  That’s just too much for some.  Respect is the ability and willingness to talk things through when a problem arises; the ability to listen and the willingness to understand.  Respect is also having faith and trust in your partner and them having trust in you.  Respect is the willingness to instill confidence in your partner making them feel good about themselves. Sure there are more ways that respect could be shown, but I think I’ve covered some of the more basic areas.  In a healthy relationship the expectation should be, with regard to respect, that your partner will listen to your ideas, heed your thoughts and words, participate in activities that you like, or at least pay attention and act interested.  Furthermore, your partner should be expected to be encouraging and nurturing, be trustworthy and understanding in times of difficulty. Remember that respect is a two way street so for what ever it is you expect from your partner, be prepared to return the favor, without question. The consequences of a relationship that lacks common respect is surely failure.

  It’s not just that, though.  In my experience, I definitely felt my self esteem was leveled.  I felt stupid and idiotic.  There are countless ways a lack of respect can negatively impact a person, let alone a relationship.  Continuing in a relationship with a lack of respect is pointless, especially if communication is not present.  If someone is in a relationship lacking the very basic components of respect that I mentioned above then one needs to ask themselves if that is really a worthwhile relationship? Chances are that it’s not. Signup for Our Newsletter Get Us in Your Inbox! Online Dating, Sex, and Relationship Advice Tips in Your Inbox… Follow @theurbandater Like this:Like Loading…

Share This Article Facebook1Tweet0Pin0 Posted in: Dating & Relationships, Tips & Advice Tagged in: advice, Relationships, respect “You must remember this..A kiss is still a kiss..A sigh is just a sigh..The fundamental things apply..As time goes by” –Frank Sinatra I’ve been seeing signs that the metrosexual revolution’s over, guys. According to the women and guys I know, it appears as though the fad is passing to a degree with the rise of what some on social networks have dubbed the “Menaissance.” I actually saw a YouTube presentation detailing the downfall of the former and the rise of the latter. But, what are we morphing into now? Or, better yet, what SHOULD we guys morph into in the 21st Century? To understand where we’re going, I think you have to look at where the metrosexual craze and its benefits or failures have been. As I see it, a metrosexual guy took pride in doing three things well: fashion, healthy lifestyles, and by virtue of the first two, being more refined dating prospects for women. While that was great for a while, apparently the biggest criticisms I’ve seen of the movement was that it took away some of the more masculine things women liked about guys in the process. Debates could rage on forever about whether that’s true or not, but to a degree, that isn’t a bad thing. Guys needed refining in some of our Neanderthal ways. But how can we bring back a little of that without going too far into Tim Allen territory? The very first two parts of the metrosexual craze, fashion and health, I see no reason to change. Guys have always needed help with fashion issues and going back to a T-shirt and jeans full time is just not going to provide many dating favors. Living healthy lifestyles including exercise and perhaps learning to cook are good evolutionary tools anyone can use when done in moderation.

Combining looking good with being fit and providing the sensuality of a good meal for your date I don’t think could be misconstrued as a bad thing in any dating circles. But what needs fixing if the metrosexual’s going the way of the dinosaur? The first thing I think guys need to get back in touch with is our inner ability to be self-reliant. We’ve become too reliant on technology and accepted the ease of just asking for help with things we’ve done well for years previously. Fixing cars, appliances, and being able to camp out without the aid of Wal-Mart’s modern conveniences have all taken a header as such. I think Patti Stanger once said guys need to feel like hunters and gatherers from time to time, it’s in our blood somehow. Well, then we need to get back in touch with that. I think one of my very own post-divorce goals is going to be to learn how to camp without modern tools as much as possible. I’ve owned two homes so I’ve gotten my feet wet in the fixing things areas, cars aside. The second, and likely biggest, thing I think that needs fixing is the combining of all these things: fashion, healthy lifestyle, and being self-reliant with what I would call an evolved way of looking at relationships, replacing sexuality with more sensuality. To a degree, it’s been there below the surface for years and not only Barry White’s been preaching it as men have used it, or in my view abused it, for a long time. Taking time to appreciate the little things about women goes a long way, in my opinion, both in and out of the bedroom. Never taking your mind off her eyes instead of keeping them on her perfect behind early on. Considering it a privilege just to get a taste of her lips, much less the feel of her bed sheets.

Remembering that the neck, ears, and shoulders need love too and not simply when you’re looking to score. Keeping in mind that a kiss IS just a kiss and we shouldn’t be expecting it to automatically lead to a bedroom journey, taking joy in the sighs of great make outs alone. I think in the age of Jesse James, Tiger Woods, and Ben Roethlisberger it would behoove us as man to reawaken sensual thinking to lead us to fulfilling relationships with women. Of course, this isn’t something that needs to be adhered to all the time. Our Neanderthal tendencies to treat women like objects can, and I believe SHOULD, rear its head when appropriate and invited from our significant others. But for us to truly evolve, man needs to take the best of both worlds with him into the 21st Century from both the Sinatras of the past and the Brad Pitt’s of the present. But that’s my story and I’m sticking to it. Signup for Our Newsletter Get Us in Your Inbox! Online Dating, Sex, and Relationship Advice Tips in Your Inbox… Follow @theurbandater Like this:Like Loading… Share This Article Facebook1Tweet0Pin0 Posted in: Dating & Relationships, For Men Tagged in: Dating, metrosexual Just a little ad campaign for love – From Matt Simpson’s blog I will never “see it all,” I’ve decided. A man, residing in AZ, creates a Facebook ad targeting single women. First off, how effing simple and brilliant is this?

Um, pretty effing brilliant. Matt Simpson used Facebook to create an ad for himself, which he then used to filter out the “white noise” and get his ad served to the people he was most interested in. So clever! The idea for this personals-ad campaign was born out of, from what I can tell, genuine geek-factor and also a desire to work smarter and not harder. Simpson states on his blog: “To be effective, Match simply requires an excessive amount of active attention. Facebook ads are set-and-forget.” Nice and so very true! This leads me back to that discussion I had with Ross Felix about why more movers and shakers are not leveraging Facebook into their dating service strategies. Facebook already carries a freakish amount of data about who we are, what we like and the company we keep. What Simpson effectively did was prove my point with his campaign. He proved you don’t need to give up your hard-earned cash to an online dating site that can’t guarantee visits or interactions with your dating profile. While this sort of campaign doesn’t put the dating service providers on “notice” per se, it should make us all do a double take and wonder why the various dating giants such as eHarm, True and Match don’t do a better job of connecting people. Is it that these sites are afraid to lose members?

I imagine there’s lot to do with that theory. However, strategies born of fear seldom win anything but a slow death of a abruptly stale brand. The market is wide-open right now for someone with a damn good idea on how to leverage Facebook and a singles network… I just don’t see that dating sites, of most varieties hope to remain viable in the near future. Who knows, maybe Facebook decides to do it themselves and run their own dating network. We’ll have to wait to see what’s in store for the “original social network.” Signup for Our Newsletter Get Us in Your Inbox! Online Dating, Sex, and Relationship Advice Tips in Your Inbox… Follow @theurbandater Like this:Like Loading…